Leaving organized religion does not necessarily mean abandoning spirituality. In fact, for many, it can be the beginning of a deeply personal and transformative spiritual journey. Without the structure of doctrine and prescribed beliefs, individuals are free to explore what spirituality means on their own terms, crafting a belief system that aligns with their authentic self.

It’s difficult to know where to start, or even if pursuing a spiritual foundation is productive. There’s so much to work through after religion isn’t part of every day life so taking it slow and being intentional about the path, is important. Consider that this is a reset and openness is now ok. Looking at how you feel connected and how to maintain a deep sense of purpose can be more meaningful than ever.

Letting Go of Old Paradigms

Religious institutions often provide a clear framework for spirituality—answers to life’s biggest questions, moral guidelines, and structured rituals. When stepping away, there might be an initial sense of loss or disorientation. The certainty that once provided comfort is gone, and in its place is the vast openness of possibility. It can be overwhelming, but also freeing. Letting go of rigid doctrines allows space for growth, self-discovery, and a renewed connection to the sacred or divine in ways that feel truer.

HOW: Letting go isn’t always easy. Religious practices and belief systems are often deeply ingrained and habitual. You may find yourself thinking or doing things in the same ways that you’ve been taught, or even conditioned, your whole life. Be patient with yourself. Being aware is the first step, reframing is the second. Lose the attachment that you have to figure it all out at once. Instead, develop a clear strategy for how to promote new ways to think, be, and express—write that strategy down. Choose to see your judgments and how you may get caught. Be mindful that shame is where you’re moving from, not to.

Exploring New Avenues of Spiritual Connection

Spirituality beyond religion can take many forms. Some may find solace in nature, experiencing a profound sense of connection while hiking in the mountains, watching a sunrise, or stargazing (my personal favorite). Others may explore meditation, energy healing, or mindfulness as a means to connect with something greater than themselves. Journaling, art, music, and other creative expression can also serve as spiritual practices, allowing individuals to explore their inner world and externalize their emotions and insights.

HOW: Choose one activity that you’ve been curious about and learn more. Find local events that may give you more information on the activity or help you engage with like-minded people. Try to choose a relaxing activity that releases the mind so that there’s room to connect with intuition and acceptance. Learning how to be rather than do can be very key to allowing a belief system shift. Purchase a journal just for you to write down thoughts about spiritual connection, insight, and thought. Learn how to right from a place of freedom, where every question can be asked and any answer is acceptable. You may be surprised at how many of your own questions can be answered by you.

Cultivating a Personal Moral Compass

One challenge that arises when leaving religion is redefining morality outside of religious texts and authorities. Instead of adhering to externally imposed rules, individuals can develop a moral compass rooted in empathy, critical thinking, and personal values. Ethics no longer hinge on fear of divine punishment but on the impact of actions on oneself and others.

It sounds very straightforward. However, there are some nuances to this step. Many people have the ability to just know how to move forward, which past ways of thinking or ethical guidelines make sense to continue embodying and which ones don’t. But if there are traumas or relationships you are still navigating, it can feel unnatural to try and connect to who you actually are instead of who you believe others will accept. Feeling sovereign and secure in the knowledge that you are living authentically isn’t an overnight task, but it can happen.

HOW: Get a notebook and create two columns on the first page. Date it. In the first column list moral or ethical behaviors or beliefs you lived by according to your past religion. Move what still resonates with you to the second column. Don’t overthink this activity, just do it according to how you feel currently. And don’t judge yourself for being where you are, wherever that is. There’s no right or wrong. Reassess every month, creating a new page each time. Take note of what changes and what doesn’t and feel free to add to, or take away from the list as your journey evolves. Commit to at least a year of intentionally examining how your spiritual self emerges.

Embracing the Unknown

A key component of redefining spirituality is learning to embrace uncertainty. Organized religion often provides definitive answers about the afterlife and divine will and purpose. Letting go of these certainties can be intimidating, but it also allows for curiosity and receptivity. Accepting that some questions may remain unanswered can foster a sense of peace and wonder rather than fear.

If you want a spiritual life, one centered on what feels true, also accept that you may go through several faith crises. As your experience changes, as you change, so will what feels right or true. There are vastly more relative truths in existence than there are absolutes. Relative truth is what we hold to be true through our lens; it’s what centers us right now, what creates unique meaning and value. As we learn and grow, many of those truths or practices will evolve and, as we allow them, change into higher purpose and understanding. Staying attached to what we’ve outgrown creates suffering and leads us back to attaching to what no longer benefits us. Learning to be open and accepting of what new beliefs create growth is paramount to happiness and peace.

HOW: Read and learn. If this is more spiritual for you, keep new material simple but be open to fresh ideas, unique spiritual practice, and those who offer perspectives that feel beneficial to your peace. Feeling peace in the body through meditation, nature, or somatics can release the urgency to know anything so you can accept what may gradually make itself known to you. (Patience, grasshopper.) If you’re looking for science to back up spirituality, understand that what we know is constantly changing. Science and spirituality are two sides of the same coin in my opinion, and are meant to compliment one another. And because they are constantly evolving, they require more openness, not less. Quantum mechanics is very connected to spirituality and is my suggestion for anyone who prefers that science be a part of the spiritual experience. Some things are still not provable in traditional ways, however, so my advice is not to demand proof of everything. If you still want empirical evidence, you may need to be ok not having all the answers. Honestly, no one currently has that anyway, so you’re in good company.

(I have provided a list of several books you can start with here.)

Finding Community and Support

Spirituality does not have to be a solitary experience. Many former religious individuals seek out communities of like-minded people—whether in spiritual groups, philosophy clubs, or online spaces—to share their journeys and explore ideas together. Engaging in open conversations, attending retreats, or participating in group meditations can provide support and connection without the constraints of dogma.

As you work through this in the beginning, finding common interests with others is important. As you grow in that space, and as you feel more secure and comfortable in who you are and what your system of beliefs are, be open to widening your circle of support to include individuals who may be able to offer unique and even differing perspectives. Our world can become a very small echo chamber if we allow ourselves to only feel accepted and validated by people who don’t ever challenge how we think. This has been difficult for me at times, but some of my most rewarding friendships and interactions are with people who aren’t like me in profound ways. Connection happens when we are accepting of others and their unique lens without demanding that they see the world through ours. Healing after hard experiences with family, friends and/or members of the church we belonged to happens in better ways with a wide variety of connections.

HOW: This can be the best part about finding spirituality outside religion. Take a class, online or otherwise. Preferably an interactive class that allows you to connect with others real-time. Read a book with someone who is also going through similar shifts in their life and share with one another how the book impacts you on a spiritual level. Organize time in nature with people who love to hike or explore. Look for opportunities to share your time or gifts inside your community. Focusing on helping others in meaningful ways can create purpose and a connection with a world that is bigger than we are individually. Often, we benefit the most.

Creating Meaning on Your Own Terms

Ultimately, spirituality is a deeply personal experience. It is about finding what resonates with you, what brings you peace, and what helps you feel connected to yourself, others, and the universe. Whether through contemplation, service, creativity, or simply being present in the moment, redefining spirituality is an opportunity to shape a fulfilling and meaningful path that is uniquely yours. Give yourself permission to examine life buffet style, choosing beliefs and experiences based on how you feel and what you know about them through intentional research and open understanding.

Use discernment as you engage with what can feel like a new world. It can feel necessary to try to get as far away from the religion you’ve left as possible just so you feel safe. This is often a trauma response to feeling controlled, trapped, or deceived, and can be healed with honest work. Be open as you learn more about the world you now live in, and know that it’s ok not to associate everything you were taught during your time inside religion with being wrong, or bad. It is also ok to responsibly move in brand new directions, even ones that were discouraged as part of living a religiously moral life. Separating what is actually best for you from what a belief system defined as best for you, takes courage and awareness.

Leaving organized religion is not an end—it is a beginning. It is a chance to craft a life that aligns with your deepest truths, to embrace a spirituality that feels authentic, and to walk forward with curiosity, openness, and purpose.